spring is in the air

Spring is just around the corner and this week the temps will actually be in the 60's and beyond. Here's a few things that I will be looking forward to:

Long walks in the park and a new tradition of yoga in the park with my girlfriends.

Snow Cones. Especially the purple cow, bubblegum and grape. 

Flowers blooming. Especially peonies.

Patios. Sunday Funday anyone?

Getting back into my running routine.

another 100 words

He could have opened the boxes that he stacked in his guest bedroom while I was having brunch with my family. He could have done it on his own and never mentioned it taking place but he's the guy that waits for you to come back over to open his birthday gifts because he wants you to be an active participant in his life. I felt honored to watch and he probably didn't even think twice about letting me be there for this intimate moment. We spent the rest of the day alternating roles between comfortable lovers and fidgety admirers.

so are we going to label this?

What constitutes a serious relationship? Is it when you start sleeping together regularly? When you start spending copious amounts of time with one another? When you utter those three little words? Or is it only when you have the dreaded talk? I must thank Allen for the title of this post because he came up with this cute yet direct way of asking. I would like to think that once sex gets involved in anything, there should be a talk, maybe not the talk but something that makes sense for both parties. You can't be too careful these days. If you're a woman, you naturally want to know where things are going. And although some men like being in relationships, most are slightly afraid of the label which translates to commitment. I must say that I am in the same boat. I have some fear about relationships these days. Yes, I'm going to blame my failed marriage and I promise to only use this as an excuse for a short period of time but it does make you a little gun shy. And then you become worried that you are going to repeat your mistakes and unravel many many months of sessions with your analyst... Sigh. Taking your time is good. Yes, the hot and heavy can be very fun but it doesn't last. Or at least it usually doesn't. As I have gotten older, I have realized that I want an actual partner or a partner in crime. Oh and there is a woodpecker that lives outside my house. I have been hearing the pecking the past few morning. Go figure. Anyone who knows me, will understand why this is relevant.

pretty things for some weekend inspiration

31

My birthday is Sunday and I'm rather looking forward to closing the chapter on 30. This year has started out pretty well and I will make sure that this trend continues. Tonight I'm hanging out with a buddy from high school and tomorrow a girlfriend and I are having a date night and going to see Chicago (the musical not the band) at the Civic Center. On Sunday I will be gathering the nearest and dearest for a birthday brunch and a little Sunday Funday to follow. I took Monday off so I have a three day weekend which will be quite lovely. Cheers!

the truth can be a bitter pill

“People will kill you over time, and how they’ll kill you is with tiny, harmless phrases, like: ‘be realistic.’”  Dylan Moran

This is so true. I don't like the word harmless, though. I think people use tiny little phrases to jab you ever so slightly. After too many, you end up with a lot of resentment and a gaping hole. It's funny how we say that talk is cheap and if you want to know about a person, observe their actions. But I find that people can be just as affected by words. Words start wars, perhaps actions determine who wins. 

I can be quite the smart ass and although I generally only jest, I also believe that there is a grain of truth in every joke. I am definitely one of those people that hide behind humor. Better to be laughing than crying is my motto and I find that people are more willing to laugh with you than share a good cry session. I want to be the first one to laugh at myself and admit to whatever crazy/stupid thing that I have done. That's how I deal with being a human being. People can be so toxic, though. Insecurity, jealousy, even plain cruelty make people shit bags full of underhanded comments and jabs to make you feel bad. I think we should all be more aware with what we say to the people we encounter, and especially the ones that we love. Golden Rule, kids. 

poetry post

Have I mentioned my love for Charles Bukowski? He is very engaging through his poetry. He doesn't use fluff or worry about rhyming and his words stream down the page in an almost chaotic fashion. Here is one of my favorites:


Alone With Everybody

the flesh covers the bone
and they put a mind
in there and
sometimes a soul,
and the women break
vases against the walls
and the men drink too
much
and nobody finds the
one
but keep
looking
crawling in and out
of beds.
flesh covers
the bone and the
flesh searches
for more than
flesh.

there's no chance
at all:
we are all trapped
by a singular
fate.

nobody ever finds
the one.

the city dumps fill
the junkyards fill
the madhouses fill
the hospitals fill
the graveyards fill

nothing else
fills.

Not the most uplifting but his generally aren't. Who hasn't felt this way? A lot of his work focuses on the women that have come and gone from his life and his quest for "the one" or even asking if that exists. I can relate. Nothing else fills.